I am feeling kind of melancholy today. I have sat here this morning and thought back on forty other birthdays that have rolled around. Yep...I said it.....this is the fortieth time I have wished my son a Happy Birthday. Today is his big day.. Eric was not born under my heart....but he sure was born in it. I think I fell in love with him the very first time he reached his hand up to take mine. I was his....hook, line, and sinker.
He was and is a very special fellow in my life. He has an infectious smile, a wonderful sense of humor, he is a Christian, he is quite a man. I am so proud of him and all he has accomplished in his life. So today I wanted to let him know how special he is in my eyes. Eric was born with a club foot. He has hand many surgeries in his young life....but believe me...nothing ever kept him down. One Christmas he got three big Tonka trucks and he loved them. One day he jumped off the school bus, lugged his three trucks back to the school bus (one of the joys of country living), and came into the house smiling. He had traded his trucks for a necklace another little boy had....for me. I wanted to strangle and hug him at the same time. I tried to explain how he had gotten ripped off....and we did eventually make the swap. The necklace belonged to the other boys mom....and she did not give it away. Eric fell off his bicycle once.....and hurt himself. He could move his arm, his fingers, so I thought it was just bruised. A few days later it was three times it's normal size.........and yes, it was broken. I felt terrible. I sat there in the emergency room with him....and he hugged me and told me, "it's ok momma....you didn't know....and it didn't hurt that much." You have got to love this guy. I spanked him once for swinging on his grandmother's hanging quilt frame...he had Hot Wheels in his pocket....I busted a blood vessel on my hand. Needless to say....that was the last spanking he ever got. He took a really tall girl to the prom once....Eric was six foot....she was taller.....and I asked him if she didn't intimidate him....his reply was, "Nope....she is the coolest girl ever." The next year he took a girl who was not even 5 foot. As a child he always found joy in most things outdoors. He was 100% boy. I have had my share of frogs and lizards. He and his cousin set a man's corn field on fire....using magnifying glasses to burn the behinds of ants. There are hundreds of these stories.
Then....one day I turned around and a military man had come to take him to boot camp. As I closed the door on them.....I put my face against the coolness of the door....and cried until there was nothing left to cry. The Army had taken my heart. Eric would never live in my house again. He matured. He married. He became a father. He was still precious. There are so many memories I could share....forty years worth....but I will save them for another day. I don't think I have enough blog space. I wish you could all meet him. Once you did...you would never be the same....he is something else. Happy Birthday to you son! May you have a blessed and awesome day.....and many more just like it.
Always My Son
You became my son, a part of me, and Eric, that will never change,
No matter what you do in life my love for you will still remain.
I did not hold you as a baby and look into your wee face,
I held you as a small child and knew no one could take your place.
I knew from the beginning, you would grow to be a man,
And anything choices you would make I’d try to understand.
I knew you would leave one day and follow your own heart,
I always prayed that in your life I’d always have a part.
I knew some things you did in life would give me so much pride,
But also realized some things would tear me up inside.
I only want the best for you and want you to succeed,
And want you to find happiness with everything you need.
My job was just to guide you and give you a helping hand,
You choose the path you were to take now that you are a man.
Along the road that you will choose, whatever that may be,
Just remember this my precious son that you can count on me.
I know this life's not perfect and we do the best we can,
Just realize I love you and I’ll always understand.
I knew one day you would grow up and you would leave my nest,
I will do what I can for you and let God do the rest.
I am proud to have been your mom for all your childhood years,
And revisiting them today has brought on some Mom tears.
Just remember in my heart you are a special one,
And I will always proudly tell the world, "this is my beloved son."
Happy Birthday, Eric!