I have possibly ten things that drive me nuts. 1. My numero uno would be a southern link phone that serves as walky talkies. I hate hearing other peoples phone conversations....let alone both ends of it. When you are in a restaurant, or out in public in general....don't talk. 2. My second one would be how people use of the words seen and saw in a sentence. Nothing scalds me more than to hear someone say I seen a good movie last night. Contrary to popular belief....redneckism is a disease. 3. Number three would have to be men correcting their lower anatomy in public. It is not going to fall off...or go anywhere...if something needs fixing....excuse yourself and go to the restroom. 4. Number four would be in Walmart when children act up and momma's tell them...."just wait til your daddy get's home." Let me tell you something I feared my momma a whole lot more than my daddy. There was no waiting for him to dole out discipline when I was a child. My mom believed....if you do the crime....you do the time....NOW! Flip-flops are relatively painful when they are waved across your legs in a rapid succession. 5. Commercials with starving children and animals. They make me cry and then make me mad because they made me cry. I would really love to know how much money Sarah McLaughlin gives to abused animals....or Sally Struthers contributes to starving children in Africa. 6. The act of being a redneck. Why is it that whenever Alabama makes national news....the redneck is always the one interviewed? There are smart people here in this state...but they rarely make the news. 7. People assuming that if you are from Alabama....you are either a redneck....or married to your first cousin. There are laws against things like that....you can only marry your third cousin in Alabama....it has to be that way....because we are kin to everyone. 8. Someone telling me...."You remember so and so....don't you?" (My response is supposed to be, "yes of course....how could I ever forget?"....yet in reality....I don't have a clue. The one time I bit and responded appropriately.....the lady in question laughed loudly and told me she had not seen me since I was 14 months old.....well I don't know about you.....but I don't have a massive memory collection of that year. Heck...I can barely remember 2007. 9. People who tell you ....No...and then complain cause they could have done it better. If that were the case....then why didn't you?
and rounding out my top ten list....would be people who bring babies to weddings. I had three children....it is the bride's day....leave them at home. Nothing is any worse than beautiful video footage of the wedding....and not being able to hear a blasted thing....because of the babies crying in harmony in the audience. Either....pay a baby sitter....or see to it that a nursery is provided. I know these are just little quirky things, and I am not going to go on a screaming rampage when they happen to appear in my daily life.....nope...I will be the one mumbling.....bless her little heart....her momma did not teach her any better.....or never used a flip flop on her. See you soon.
To Joey, With Love....WINNER!
9 months ago