Isaiah 6:8

8 Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

Monday, September 21, 2009

I'm Back!

Well, it has been two weeks since I took my parents to The Meadows on Hillabee. I have made a conscious effort to visit them every day...sometimes I will sit and watch television with them for an hour or so, other days I plan my visits so I can leave when they go to dinner and I am only there for 30 minutes. The point is I visit and make sure to hug them and tell them I love them each day. My mom is still wanting to come home but those comments are fewer and farther between. My dad has no clue where he is. He is content to eat, sleep, and watch tv. I did not realize until yesterday how much this whole episode in my life has taken out of me....I was sitting in church and Brother Bill was talking about the "Word that Never Comes Back...Now." I sat there and got a little misty eyed when I thought of my now. My now consists of meeting my parents needs, my husbands needs, my spiritual needs and I am drowning. On my way to Waverly church - to sing and hear my sweet Frank preach...I heard the song Cry Out to Jesus by Third Day. I love to hear Mac Powell sing. He really does not have a great voice...but it is a powerful voice...it sounds as if he is really dealing with the pain he sings of. I sat in the back seat of Carolyn and Phil's car, listened to the song and had a small come apart. Frank preached on Freedom and I felt as if God was pointing his finger at me going....You! I realized that I have not been nurturing myself these last couple of weeks. I have been so busy taking care of everyone else I was missing myself. So, today is Monday....a new start to a new week....and I am putting myself back on track. I have wants, needs, desires, and feelings too...and they count!. I will be back reading posts and commenting this week....so watch out blogging world....the new and improved Karen is BACK! Happy Monday!

7 comments:

wind6 said...

Welcome back, friend!! You deserve this day!

Mid-Atlantic Martha said...

I've been missing you! I'm glad that you're going to be taking care of yourself -- now you know that you're parents are in a safe and good place - DO treat yourself to participating in YOUR life and doing things for YOU! (hard advice to follow....I know)

Beverly @ The Buzz said...

Glad to have you back--and in better spirits. Remember the advice given on planes: you have to secure your own mask first, THEN take care of others. You can't get water from an empty pitcher. Sorry, I didn't mean for this to turn into a cliche comment. ((hugs))

Kelly said...

Well, I'm so glad you're going to be nurturing you! It is very important. We're no good to anyone if we're not good to ourselves.

Leigh of Bloggeritaville said...

I am so glad that your parents are getting the round clock care they need....and you need.
Ok a piece of advice, my husbands grandma lves five minutes from us at the nursing home (we had her moved little over a month ago from her assisted living facility). I agree visit as often as you can, because that is the only way you can stay on top of things like how often things are being done, they they are going out for their meals, that their garbage is cleaned...little things and go at diffenrt times, do not be consistant. However, do not feel like you have to go everyday. We all need a mental break now and then. It is ok to have a day for Karen, where you can mentally recharge. Seeing your parents in a diffent scene can be depressing at times, they are in good hands, so it may be good to say go four times a week as opposed to 7. I had to convince my mother in law of that and she now agrees. Additionally, you dont have to spend hours, just a five minute pop in..."Hey mom , I am on my way to walmart, just wanted to stop by to see if I can bring your something...." and those five minutes do count for a daily visit. just a reminder that you are there and thinking of them is enough for them to know and you not to get mentally worn down.
I just want you to know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Jacki said...

Welcome Back Karen!
I've been praying for you while you've been gone! I totally understand. My storm is finally passing (after a long hard downpour). I just stick to Ray Boltz "The Anchor Holds" ! It's carried me thru many many storms!

You MUST take care of yourself first, or there is nothing left to give to others!
((Hugs To You))

Shelia said...

I'm so glad you've come to visit me today! I hear your pain and I want to encourage you! Where I live, we were hit by a hurricane just about this time last year. My 86 year old mother was living on her own in her condo. Of course we had to leave the island for safety. We were blessed that our home didn't have much damage. Mother was not able to go back to hers and had to move in with us. Well, she lived with us for 8 months. I have not brothers or sisters to help. My mother and I are best of friends but while living with us - our house wasn't our house. She fell and broke her arm a couple of days after Christmas. Our hospital was closed since the storm and had to have her taken 50 miles away! Needless to say, I was having to wait on her hand and foot. Not that I didn't want to, but she couldn't get out of bed and I had to help her. She would wake up every 2 hours through the night and I became so worn out! I thought I was going to die. I wasn't able to go to church for 3 months and I'm the pianist! I know this is long, but after mother got better, we realizes she couldn't live by herself anymore. We found a retirement home close to us and moved her in. She really didn't like it, but knew she couldn't stay by herself.
I felt a little guilty, but I felt free! People kept telling me to take cae of myself, but it's really hard when there is so much to do. So now that you have your folks in a place where they can be taken care of, you really do need to take time for yourself! Rest, read, pray, play! You'll get refreshed again and will be able to do what you need to again.
Be a sweetie,
Shelia ;)