Isaiah 6:8

8 Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Trust and Obey, For There Is No Other Way

Do you know what trust is?  I thought I did but the last few days have really tested my idea of what trust is.  Trust, according to the Webster's Dictionary as a verb means to believe in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of.  Ok...I have believed and trusted God since I was a child....but have I really?...or when the tough got going did doubt enter into my life equation.  I am afraid to say it was the latter.  I am human and I have struggled and fretted because my life wasn't going the way I wanted it to?  Monday night I found myself feeling just like that.  As a human I have legitimate needs and desires.  I know what I think is going to make me happy and I do like all other humans do....I pray for it with all my might, I fervently ask God to help me get it.  and...sometimes if it doesn't come to pass, I find myself feeling saddened, disappointed, angry and even frustrated.  I find myself asking God, "WHY?"  Then there are the times I actually do get what yoI thought I wanted, only to discover that it doesn't make me happy after all, just totally baffled and confused.  It is then I find myself asking God, "What gives here?'  I know of numerous Christians who repeat this cycle their entire life, wondering what they're doing wrong.  I am an authority on this because I was/am one of them.  But you know there is a easy spiritual secret that exists and that can free you from this is God....period....yep, that is what I God.  So I find myself questioning how easy it is for me to trust in things I can physically touch or see.  Herein is where my story lies.  Over the friends Beth and Mary were hospitalized for strange things....I prayed....I believed God would heal them....and when it did not happen quick enough to suit me....I became a doubting Thomas.  Beth eventually healed.....and Mary came home yesterday after 70+ days in the hospital.  I went to see her once when she was in a medically induced coma and prayed over her....I touched her face, her hands, her legs, her feet and prayed.....I prayed she would open her eyes and everything would be as it was before July 1st.  I cried coming home from the hospital because...that did not happen.  What I came to realize through prayer was that God WAS healing He knew she needed.  When did I go to Medical School and know about medicine....NEVER!  He is the Great I needed to let Him do His job.  On Monday....a friend of mine came to me with a concern about her health, she had decided that she was in advanced stages of the "C" word.  I was concerned and began praying that night that God would help her decide to go to the doctor.  She made that call on Tuesday and has an appointment 2:20 CST....will I be praying?  You bet.  I made sure I asked for a specific I could be there in the room through intercessory prayer. Yesterday, Frank came in with a small issue of a possible melanoma on his back.  I have to admit....the "C" word terrifies me.  Then....another friend came to me with a female issue....and I began praying fervently for all three of them.  Through the praying process I have come to discover that even though it is my life.....the bottom line is that my wants may not agree with God's wants for me....or my friends.  For the first time in a long time I believe that God knows what's best for me and for us all.    Now....if I could just make that leap from knowing to doing?  Well in taking a prayer stance and trusting I am coming to realize that the Holy Spirit knows me better than I actually know myself, he is going to give me exactly what I need to make this leap of faith. Thank goodness He's infinitely patient, so he'll let me test this new trusting in the Lord concept in little baby steps...and just like my earthly father He'll catch me if I fall down flat on my face and He is going to be there rejoicing with me when I succeed.  I am so thankful that He loves me enough to allow me to trust Him.  Have a wonderful Thursday.  Pray for friends and precious Frank!

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